{"id":271,"date":"2010-11-29T08:12:47","date_gmt":"2010-11-29T16:12:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lisathorpeartist.wordpress.com\/?p=271"},"modified":"2010-11-29T08:12:47","modified_gmt":"2010-11-29T16:12:47","slug":"birthdays-and-deathdays","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lisathorpe.com\/index.php\/2010\/11\/29\/birthdays-and-deathdays\/","title":{"rendered":"Birthdays and Deathdays"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Last Wednesday we practiced a tradition that we have been performing for the past five years we celebrated the birth of my husband Jack\u2019s mom, and my dear friend Leonora.\u00a0 We began the tradition six years ago, a year after her death, to mark the building of the Trail-side Sanctuary.\u00a0 The Trail-side Sanctuary is a lovely structure reminiscent of a Japanese tea-house built by local sculptor and woodworker Jordy Morgan.\u00a0 Another artist Todd Reed crafted the massive ceramic altar in the middle shaped to bring to mind a chiming Japanese bell.\u00a0 Each year to give thanks for her life among us we tromp out to the back acres, here at The Bishop\u2019s Ranch, with buckets and brooms and rags to clean the Sanctuary.\u00a0 We brush away the cobwebs and sweep out the oak leaves; we scrub away the bird dropping and toss out all the items laid in the altar over the year.\u00a0 We start fresh.\u00a0 We lay flowers in the alter bowl and this year we brought ginkgo leaves from the trees on the Ranch grounds that we planted in Leonora\u2019s honor.\u00a0 She loved the gingko tree and it\u2019s beautiful leaves, and the ginkgo reminds us each year that her birthday is coming as the leathery leaves turn yellow and November works it\u2019s way to winter.\u00a0 Jack brings the martini shaker (a Leonora favorite) and we mix a martini for ourselves and pour one for her as well.\u00a0 We give thanks and read a poem or sing a song.\u00a0 Then, before we go, we pour the martini around the altar.\u00a0 As in many years before we walk home in the waning fall light, the air crisp, scarves wrapped tight around our necks, throats thick and sore from memories and wishful thinking.<\/p>\n

Back when we had the Sanctuary built to honor both Jack\u2019s parents lives, we made a conscious decision to perform the ritual cleaning on their birthdays in November and May and not their death days.\u00a0 Unfortunately, in the case of Leonora, the two are closely intertwined.\u00a0 We celebrated her last birthday together and then just nine short days later she died.\u00a0 The anniversary of her death is this Saturday.\u00a0 The day after I post again. I struggle with this day, not wanting to pick the hard scab of this memory, not wanting to return to a frightening and confusing experience, a day where time slowed to a an excruciating crawl and an inevitable end.\u00a0 Leave sleeping dogs lay as they say\u2026but it won\u2019t stay still, this dog of a memory. It wants to go for a walk, wants to bark and run.\u00a0 I think it may be time to take it off its leash and see where it leads me.\u00a0 I\u2019ll let you know where this dog of a memory guides me on Friday.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Last Wednesday we practiced a tradition that we have been performing for the past five years we celebrated the birth of my husband Jack\u2019s mom, and my dear friend Leonora.\u00a0 We began the tradition six years ago, a year after […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"_price":"","_stock":"","_tribe_ticket_header":"","_tribe_default_ticket_provider":"","_tribe_ticket_capacity":"0","_ticket_start_date":"","_ticket_end_date":"","_tribe_ticket_show_description":"","_tribe_ticket_show_not_going":false,"_tribe_ticket_use_global_stock":"","_tribe_ticket_global_stock_level":"","_global_stock_mode":"","_global_stock_cap":"","_tribe_rsvp_for_event":"","_tribe_ticket_going_count":"","_tribe_ticket_not_going_count":"","_tribe_tickets_list":"[]","_tribe_ticket_has_attendee_info_fields":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[37,88],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-271","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-art","category-inspiration"],"yoast_head":"\nBirthdays and Deathdays - Lisa Thorpe<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/lisathorpe.com\/index.php\/2010\/11\/29\/birthdays-and-deathdays\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Birthdays and Deathdays - Lisa Thorpe\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Last Wednesday we practiced a tradition that we have been performing for the past five years we celebrated the birth of my husband Jack\u2019s mom, and my dear friend Leonora.\u00a0 We began the tradition six years ago, a year after […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/lisathorpe.com\/index.php\/2010\/11\/29\/birthdays-and-deathdays\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Lisa Thorpe\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2010-11-29T16:12:47+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/lisathorpeartist.files.wordpress.com\/2010\/11\/12a-leonorasbd.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Lisa Thorpe\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Lisa Thorpe\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/index.php\\\/2010\\\/11\\\/29\\\/birthdays-and-deathdays\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/index.php\\\/2010\\\/11\\\/29\\\/birthdays-and-deathdays\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Lisa Thorpe\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/35336a742e5576ec28ef9520c7a79fe0\"},\"headline\":\"Birthdays and Deathdays\",\"datePublished\":\"2010-11-29T16:12:47+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/index.php\\\/2010\\\/11\\\/29\\\/birthdays-and-deathdays\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":478,\"commentCount\":5,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/35336a742e5576ec28ef9520c7a79fe0\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/index.php\\\/2010\\\/11\\\/29\\\/birthdays-and-deathdays\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\\\/\\\/lisathorpeartist.files.wordpress.com\\\/2010\\\/11\\\/12a-leonorasbd.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Art\",\"Inspiration\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/index.php\\\/2010\\\/11\\\/29\\\/birthdays-and-deathdays\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/index.php\\\/2010\\\/11\\\/29\\\/birthdays-and-deathdays\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/lisathorpe.com\\\/index.php\\\/2010\\\/11\\\/29\\\/birthdays-and-deathdays\\\/\",\"name\":\"Birthdays and Deathdays - 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